Sexual Charisma for Actors

Sexual Charisma for Actors: A secret unspoken edge

by Gemma Kaye

Let’s talk about sex… *eek!

Well not sex… *phew!

Sexual charisma. Sexual energy. And how it relates to acting.

It’s a tricky subject. But over the last year or two a number of key industry mentors (producers, casting directors, writers, teachers) have secretly talked to me about the importance of an actor’s sexual charisma and I have become convinced that sexual charisma is a secret, unspoken part of an actor’s success.

So I believe we need to start an upfront dialogue about it – to have the guts to explore, understand and consciously create our sexual charisma in order to maximise results in our careers.

Now – let me be clear – I am NOT talking about the casting couch. AND – not every actor is a sex symbol. Not every actor has to be. Not every actor wants to be!

There are stereotypical “sex symbol” actors out there… like Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt. But even the more unconventional stars have a big serving of sexual charisma… like Tom Hanks, Jack Black, Drew Barrymore, Rebel Wilson… they don’t necessarily fit the “sex symbol” mold… and yet you can’t deny they have sexual charisma!

Why is sexual charisma so important? Well…sexual energy is the most creative force on earth. It creates life after all. So if you refuse it, or cut yourself off from this flow of energy, you are going to miss out on a big source of power.

But where do we start??

According to Google the definition of charisma is – “Compelling attractiveness or charm that can inspire devotion in others.”

Yep. Actors definitely want that!

So how do we get it?

I believe it comes down to energy. Simply being comfortable with yourself and your sexual energy, is a rare thing. And that’s why it’s so attractive. People who know themselves and accept themselves are very compelling to be around.

Now, sexual energy is a personal thing, so you need to decide for yourself what you might do to get to know your sexual energy, become comfortable with your sexual energy, and therefore enhance your professional sexual charisma.

However, here are some of the things I have done…

1. Attended a weekend workshop designed to get me in touch with my “primal feminine”. (“Luscious Woman” by Jacqueline Hellyer. Google her. She has stuff for men too.)
2. Started subscribing to blogs and enews about sex and relationships so that conversations about sex pop up in my life via my inbox regularly… my mind is triggered to think and grow in this area as a normal part of my life.
3. Started sharing interesting articles I come across about sex and relationships on Facebook.
4. Started participating in more conversations on people’s newsfeeds, and being cheekier in general with comments and responses on Facebook… and in life!
5. Created a film project with a character dealing with a personal sexual transformation, so I could explore these concepts creatively – www.facebook.com/my5yrswithoutsex
6. Started saying ‘no’ to roles where a character was out of alignment with the energy and archetypes I want to play.
7. Updated my showreel using my new brand “hot nerd”… a catch-phrase I discovered throughout this exploratory process.
8. Took on flirting with cute guys for no reason.
9. Got back in the dating game!
10. Bought a doona cover that gives me a great feeling every time I look at it. It’s such a small thing… but this has been incredibly powerful.

No-one else will talk to you about this area of your life or career – it’s hard to talk about! That’s why I’m doing it.

My research has shown me that sexual charisma is one of the four key personal qualities that make up the “X-factor” – that mysterious elusive “it” factor that maximises your impact, and maximises your cast-ability. And in an industry with 90-98% unemployment, an actor needs every edge they can get.

So… take it or leave it at your discretion. But as for me – I’ll be damned if I’m going to let anyone or anything stop me from achieving my dreams. And hopefully, I’ll help as many people as possible along the way achieve theirs.

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Gemma is an actor from Sydney, Australia who has worked extensively in film, TV, TVC, presenting and voiceover. A self-confessed psychology-nut and former counsellor (B.Psych.Hons) Gemma uses elite performance strategies to empower her career… and loves to teach them to others! To have Gemma as your personal coach for the next 5 months at a fraction of the usual cost join “Project150x” (before the March 5th deadline!) – www.igg.me/at/150x. You can also get more info, tips, and free resources by joining her mailing list at – www.getthexfactor.com.